Part 3 - How to Increase Self-love and Confidence - Master Coach Barbara Hofmeister

…Continued from June 11th

In the last few days, we talked about all the things you have already achieved and I showed you how to use EFT, the Emotional Freedom Technique to get you past emotional bumps in your path. Today we will go further into letting you love and accept yourself and boost your self-worth.

We have already agreed that our inner voice can be very critical and demanding. We tend to speak to ourselves in harsh words we would never dream of directing towards other people.

Start treating yourself like you would a friend or loved one. Be kind and gentle with yourself, especially when you’re suffering fear, anxiety or pain. Isn’t that when you most support your friends? Do yourself the same favor and give yourself encouragement and celebrate your better moments. When you have a decision to make, ask yourself: “What would someone who loved themselves do?” or if that is still too difficult, ask: “What would I do if it was for …. (insert the name of the person you love most)?”

Celebrate your uniqueness and allow your authenticity.

We cause ourselves a lot of pain and suffering when we stifle our true nature and ignore our burning desires and dreams for the sake of fitting in with the status quo trying to meet the expectations of others.

You are a one-of-a-kind unprecedented human being. There will never again be someone quite like you. You are here to give the world your own special blend of gifts, passions, interests, and quirks but you can’t do that fully if you do not allow yourself to show up as your authentic self. Showing up as YOU is one of the most empowering things you can do, and it can profoundly enrich your relationship with yourself and with others.

Instead of focusing on what you perceive to be ‘wrong’ with you, focus on all of the amazing things you have to offer (look at the list you made a few days ago). We all know the saying: “Energy flows where attention goes.” The more you shift your perception towards your positive attributes, the more of them you will uncover.

Sometimes an event or a person triggers a strong feeling of anger or pain inside of us, or we simply wake up feeling irritable for no obvious reason. When that happens, don’t beat yourself up for letting it get to you, or try to sweep it under the carpet. Instead, surrender to the feeling and come to peace with it. Observe where in your body you can feel the feeling of pain, anger or irritability or whatever emotion is bothering you. Then get out of your head and into your body and focus 100% on the physical sensation. Give it space and be patient while you send it love and acceptance. Depending on how well you focus on it, it will eventually fade away and so will the emotion associated with it. Even though it is simple, this is a very powerful exercise!

Now let’s look at our aim for perfection. Our society aims for it even though it is more screwed up than ever. Fact is: ‘NOBODY IS PERFECT!”, not even you 🙂 We are all human and being that we are flawed and prone to making mistakes as we navigate through our lives to learn and grow from our experiences and that includes our failures.

I have spoken in front of tenth-of-thousands of people and know for a fact that my audiences like me best when I am at my most vulnerable. They love it when I improvise and just speak from the heart. Even though we ask for perfection, in a speaker we do not really like it. It sounds too smooth and quite often slimy (sorry guys). We want to see the person behind the speaker and the same goes for other situations. We want to see the real person with all their ups and down so realize you’re not the only one who feels vulnerable, insecure and self-critical at times. We’re all fighting our own demons. If you remember that, it will take the pressure off you and you will no longer feel isolated and alone.

To finish off, let’s quickly talk about your body. Obviously, it is important to take good care of it because it is the container our soul resides in but remember that you are not your body or your face, you are a precious soul. Your body is just the vehicle that lets you do all kinds of wonderful things. Appreciate it and treat it well but do not identify yourself with it. You are sooo much more.

If you liked these articles and want further help, please schedule a free CLARITY coaching consultation. However, be aware that I can only do 3 of these a month and they are only for people who are serious about wanting different results in their lives.