Today we want to look at our habitual ways of reacting to certain situations – again and again – in an automatic fashion.

Let me give you an example:

Someone says something that hurts you. You automatically clam up and withdraw from them without really thinking about what they have said and why they might have said it.

How can you break a disempowering pattern like that?

What type of situation sets it off?

Can you feel it coming?

Can you catch yourself before you react?

No matter how long you have had the pattern of reacting the way you do, be aware that that it is nothing but a habit and habits can be broken.

Obviously awareness is the first step.

Choice is the second step. Once you are aware of what you do, you can choose to do things different.

Let’s take the above examples and choose a different response.

Someone says something that hurts you, but instead of walking off miffed, you let them know you are bothered by what they have said. The difference is that you take responsibility for your reaction instead of blaming them and feeling a victim. Instead of “You made me feel bad”, you choose “I feel bad when you say …”

When taking responsibility you are taking control over your life. You are not the victim anymore.
Just don’t be surprised about the reaction you will get from your friend, spouse, partner… 🙂