Anger is something that can control our lifes. If we tend to get upset easily we better learn how to control that anger instead of letting it control us.

Did you know that you use 8-10 times more energy when being angry?

I read this in a medical article but I also know it to be true from my own experiences. Each time I got really upset about something I was completely exhausted afterwards. My father was a very explosive man and I was pretty bad myself when I was young but because one can be very unjust and hurtful in anger I learned to control my outbursts.

I was just chatting in the uncommon forum with a girl who got so angry that she beat up her boyfriend and as a consequence he left her. This is not the first time I hear stuff like that so I will share some of my advice with you.

“…Sounds like you really freaked out and lost the person you loved in consequence. The pain you feel can be very helpful for you to learn an important lesson because scientists have found out that we only change if the pain or the joy we feel is strong enough. In NLP they call it anchoring. Anchor the pain of this loss to something like the snap of your fingers or touching your heart or whatever gesture comes to your mind.

First put yourself into the situation again and add the actual punch, the hurt in your partners eyes etc. until you start feeling how you must have felt after punching him or after realising that he is leaving you because of your violence. Go as deep into the pain as you can and associate a gesture with it. Now each time you feel anger coming up repeat that gesture to feel the consequences. You might need to practise it a few times but this works 100 %.

If that is not enough try time line therapy. Imagine yourself in a moment of anger than leave your body and float above it and watch yourself. Float higher so you can see more of your life line (time line) and look into your future. How will it be if you continue like this?

Now go higher and go back in time to when you were small. When was the first time you felt anger, violence like that? Put yourself in that moment again and watch it from above. Now float back further until you are 15 Minutes before you felt that very first anger. In this moment you were still anger free and can make a decision to not want anger in your life. It’s not worth it…

What you decide here depends very much on you but if done properly you will be anger and violence free. If you can’t do this by yourself find a good hypno-therapist who works with this method. It is fast and very efficient.

I also suggest you stop drinking alcohol or at least drink less. After each drink have at least one glass of water and eat well if you intend to have a drink.

When you feel your anger coming take some slow deep breath into your tummy and count until 10 before reacting. That helps immediately.

All of these methods work IF you use them! Just reading about them will do nothing.

It would be nice if you could let me know what helps you best.

To an anger free life with plenty of Love
Barbara
www.trainingvisions.com

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