Continued from June 8th, 2017…
We spoke of the importance of loving yourself, of believing in yourself, of trusting yourself. If you have an issue with that, take these posts seriously because a lack of self-love will alter the path of your life negatively. I know that from my own life because I started my own personal growth journey in 1978 due to lack of self-love and zero confidence, even though I pretended to be super confident. But that story is for another time 🙂
Did you make your list of all you have already achieved and done in your life? If not, why didn’t you? What have you got to lose except your limiting beliefs?
You see when you like or love yourself more things simply become easier. You will be able to not take things personally. You will stop to belittle yourself or beat yourself up over small errors in judgment. You might even stop to hold yourself to an inhuman standard of non-existent perfection.
When you like yourself more, you will seek less outside validation and attention. Your emotions will be more stable and less of a rollercoaster always looking for other people’s opinions (judgements) and fearing to hear a negative one. You will also be less needy and in any type of relationship that alone will make a huge difference. The more you love and accept yourself, the more lovable you become!
Have you heard the saying: “We are our worst enemy?”
With few exceptions, we all have an inner critic and stopping that inner critic is a good place to start in order to boost your self-esteem. You inner critic is not all bad. It can spur you on to get things done but more often than not, it whispers or shouts destructive thoughts into your mind. Thoughts like: “Why are you so sloppy?” or “Typical, too much salt again” or “You were supposed to do that yesterday.” “Your hair looks dreadful today. You can’t go out like this.” or “Accept it, you are just not good enough.”
However, you don’t have to accept these thoughts, after all, they are created by your mind and you can learn to control them. You can minimize them and replace them with more helpful thoughts. It will eventually change how you view yourself.
One way to do so is simply to say “STOP! We are not going there!” whenever your inner critic pipes up in your mind. Or use the snapping method to teach your mind (and yourself). That is what I have used and still use occasionally when I feel it is needed. You put a rubber band around your wrist and whenever your inner voice tells you something disempowering, you say STOP! and snap the rubber bank. You need to “feel” it if you want it to work. After all, you are training your mind to focus on things you want, things that help you instead of negative self-talk.
By quieting your inner critic and raising your self-love and self-esteem you’ll start to feel more deserving and will go after what you really want with more belief and much higher motivation.
So let’s continue to get you there:
Use the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT).
This is a wonderful healing tool that is easy to learn and to integrate into your daily life. You tap on these specific points of your body while repeating a mantra like affirmation. Start on karate chop and end on top of the head. Use it whenever you’re feeling anxious or self-critical about a particular issue or problem. It will help you to release your negative emotional charge around it and establish inner calm and peace.
I recommend you use the following mantra, “Even though I (insert whatever you are struggling with), I deeply and completely love and accept myself”. Do a few rounds of tapping until you feel a release or until you feel lighter or better.
Try it out and tell me how you are doing. I will give you more tips in the next few days.
Love and Light
Barbara
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